The fool thinks he has won a battle when he bullies with
But knowing how to be forbearing- that makes one victorious.
The worse of the two is he who, when abused, retaliates.
One who does not
retaliate wins a battle hard to win.
Knowing that the other person is angry,
one who remains mindful and calm
Acts for his own best interest and for the
other's interest, too.
He is a healer of both himself and the other person
He is thought a fool only by those who do not understand the Dhamma.
The greatest prayer is patience.
Actually, if we look around, people whom we don't like and people who harm us
are in the minority. Let's say we're at work, at a social gathering, or at a
Dharma center with thirty people. How many of them do we really dislike? We
may have problems with a few people here and there, but we manage to stay in
a room together, don't we? It's not like we despise them and they hate us. The
number of people we can't stand in this world is actually very small. These
people are rare. To practice patience we need the people that we don't like.
We can't practice patience with our friends or with people who are kind to us.
Finding people that we don't like or who threaten us is not so easy. So, when
we finally find them, they are a precious treasure! They are rare to find. When
we meet them, we can think, "Fantastic, I get to practice patience now."
They say that high-level bodhisattvas pray to meet disgusting, uncooperative
people because they want to practice patience. Of course, when you really want
to meet obnoxious people, they don't show up! Why don't they turn up for high-level
bodhisattvas? Because high-level bodhisattvas don't have any anger. We could
be sitting in a room with many people whom we consider unbearable, but high-level
bodhisattvas don't see them that way at all. To them, these people appear lovable.
Bodhisattvas have such a hard time finding detestable people, whereas we come
across them so easily! So, when we find people whom we don't like, feel threatened
by, or find despicable, we should recognize that there aren't so many of them
around. Therefore, we should cherish them and take the opportunity to practice
patience with them.
Thubten Chodron, Cultivating a Compassionate Heart: The Yoga Method of Chenrezig
Some people feel patience is showing weakness or pessimism.
But, actually, patience shows the strength and clarity of mind,
which are based on wisdom and compassion.
Without proper wisdom and compassion, one cannot practice patience
Khenpo Konchog Gyaltsen Rinpoche
If you are ever to be successful in your practice of patience and tolerance, which is a critical factor in counteracting negative emotions, it will be due to the combination of your own efforts and also the opportunity provided by your enemy.
His Holiness the Dalai Lama, The Art of Happiness
Just hearing about patience does not mean
you are experiencing it now or will easily develop it. To lay
the ground for training the mind, you must first tame the mind.
To tame the mind, it is extremely important to do the basic shamata
[tranquility meditation, calm abiding] practice, which develops
calmness and tranquility. Then you can add the practice of patience,
understanding the benefits of patience and reminding yourself
to take advantage of the available antidotes.
Paths by Ven. Khenpo Karthar Rinpoche
May 3, 2011